Milestone

I suppose there comes a time in every mom's life when you hit the milestone. You loose your child. Oh yes, it happens at least once - even if just for a moment - and yesterday was our day. Go us.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - mommyhood is messy. If anyone says it isn't, they are either in denial or lying. Or on something. Like 3/4 of the stay-at-home moms at the park and various museums in Charlotte. Whatever these gals are on, I want some. Each of them looks as if its Christmas Day and they're on cloud nine. Just once I would like to see someone look, well, like me. 

Don't get me wrong. I ADORE spending time with my child and, as an ex-teacher, I am proud of the fact that I am very involved and interact with MC. However, I'm gonna put it out there. Sometimes the kid drives me nuts. There, I said it. If you are a mom and have never thought this - not even once- I would like to meet you and shake your hand and ask how in the H-E-double hockey sticks you do it. You deserve a friggin' medal. 

Yesterday was one of those days where I may or may not have thought about dropping MC off at Adam's office and telling him to figure it out - I was going home. I didn't, but the thought did cross my mind. 

We started off having a great time at the Nature Museum with a few moms from my playgroup. MC was having a BLAST and was getting out some much needed energy. Then, we made our way to the puppet/puzzle/dress up area and she found the pretend milk. The damn pretend milk. Her friend SB had the coveted piece of blue plastic and MC wanted it. Bad. SB was playing nicely and wasn't ready to give it up. Understandable. Its awesome. MC proceeded to throw one of the worst tantrums in her little 2.5 year lifespan. Yup, hurled herself on the floor right there in the middle of everyone screaming at the top of her lungs. Embarassed? You have no idea. I could feel the daggers shooting from the disapproving eyes of every Stepford mom in the museum. 

I attempted to deal with it nonchalantly as if I had everything completely under control. I moved her to the corner and told her to sit and calm down. When she was ready to play nicely and apologize for her behavior she could come back. Didn't work. No sooner had I put that little tush on the ground than it was back up running to the middle of the room screaming again..... because we all know when you are in need of throwing a tantrum, privacy is not part of the deal. You NEED an audience. 

After a few minutes of complete and utter mortification I decided it was time to go. I reached down to grab my hysterical child and drag her from the museum - but this was also not part of her plan. She took off faster than a fat kid at a Dunkin' Doughnuts grand opening. My pregnant self attempted to sprint after her, but after being bombarded by running children my path was blocked. I watched her turn the corner and that was it. She was gone. 

I spent the next 3-4 minutes scouring the museum in complete hysterics. An employee must've noticed my distress and asked if I lost someone. YES! I've lost the spawn of Satan a sweet 2 year old in a purple shirt and pink bow!! She immediately radioed other employes with the special "some idiot mom lost her kid" code and they were off. About 3 minutes later I see a pink bow bouncing to the middle of the aisle where she spots me and puts both arms out and screams, "here I am mom!". Smiling. Like nothing had even happened.

I scooped her up and told her it was time to go. The hysteria began again. Yay.

As I exited the museum with my screaming toddler, I tried to remember that all moms have "those days". I tried to remember that even if in a state of utter denial through an overabundance of prescription meds and alcohol, EVERY mom has had a day where she felt completely humiliated due to her child's behavior. 

I suppose for the moment I'll just take pride in achieving the "lost child" milestone and pray that for most its a one time occurrence.